15 August 2017

I have so many thoughts I want to share and record, but lately I don’t feel I’ve had/made the time and energy to do that. But tonight is a rainy August night, and Apollo fell to sleep very easily, so here I am contently blogging.

First of all, I adore Apollo so much. He is a part of me, bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh, and we both need each other. What a joy it is to be his mother and to be so perfectly loved by him.

Secondly, my baby boy has been teething fiercely. It is exhausting. His bottom two teeth were no problemo, but these top two have been quite unpleasant. He’s been fevering, had diarrhea, constipation, a rash, puke, loads of drool, all making for a significantly less happy boy and mama. If he doesn’t sleep as well at night, I don’t sleep as well. This morning I felt like I slept an hour and then got run over. Not awesome. I did sleep more than that of course, but I just had restless sleep with lots of waking.

Fingers crossed this phase will be over soon! And then I’ll get an amber necklace for the boy and hopefully the rest of his teeth won’t come in so violently. I just don’t know what to do to help him and it hasn’t been like that with us before. If nothing else, usually breastfeeding always helps. But one day, little boy nursed for like three minutes all day and I was loaded with milk. He finally ate when he went to bed and then I guess his belly got so full of milk that he eventually threw up all over us while I was rocking him to sleep. So. Much. Vomit. Poor boy did not feel well.

Anyway, motherhood has been tiring lately and less of a fun party. I feel like a need a little recharge. And I am getting that tonight, hanging out on the computer by myself, looking through photos, recording thoughts, listening to musics, eating fudge bars… :) Now I just need to tie dye and make cookies and play my ukulele and I should be back to my old self.

Oh! Another thing that makes me happy is wearing a romper or overalls. And jumping on the trampoline. We just got my trampoline set up and I McLove it. So do all the neighbor kids, but we haven’t let the jump on it yet, basically because we don’t want them to break their arms in our front yard.

Another way I recharge is NAPTIME. It’s kind of essential, not as essential as showering and brushing my teeth and eating. Actually, maybe it is. Yes, it is. I’m mostly referring to Apollo’s nap time being a recharge for me, but when I can nap too, it’s all the better. Usually I use his nap time to do some house project though, or to scroll through Instagram and Facebook and Pinterest and regret it when he wakes up before I had to chance to do anything productive haha. I have had some exceptional naps with Apollo recently. And I love that so much. They’re some of my favorite moments.

I really have a lot of wonderful moments. It is delightful watching Apollo experience the world, to see him so innocent and curious and pure, to feel his love and light. It’s the best. And I am really looking forward to the painful teething phase being over, but I suppose it’s all part of the process and joyful big picture.

Speaking of motherhood… I have the most wonderful mother and mother-in-law. They’re both so wonderful and strong and loving and beautiful and giving and funny. They’re just the people I need. Really, I have so many loving and supportive women around me. I feel very grateful for that.

In one hour and five minutes it is my mother’s birthday! So it’s time for an ode to my mama!

I don’t have too many recent pictures with my mom and need more. But in scrolling through all her Facebook pictures tonight, I came across this gem from our wedding December 2013. There she is helping out and being funny and loving and giving! And the day we got married, she just whipped up my perfect bouquet. I loved it. Full of lovely white flowers and green things. Mom is great with the flowers. I just really love her a lot, and I don’t think she realizes how much I love her or how wonderful I think she is. I need and rely on her a lot, and she brings so much goodness to my life.

I love my dear ol’ dad a whole lot too, but it’s my mama’s birthday, so the shoutout is going to her today. :) I really have been blessed with goodly parents. <3

Apollo just woke up to eat. I love feeding him. It’s so sweet and I love watching him eat and hold him close and hearing his cute noises and looking at his perfect face.

So… to sum up my blogging thoughts tonight, I love being a mother, but I am tired. And I hardly want to say I’m tired because I know plenty of other mothers who are much more tired and worn out than me! But it is a rewarding work to have those babies or kids look at you, full of love, and just wanting their mama. I still have plenty of moments where I just want my mom, and thank goodness she is usually just minutes away! Happy birthday to my angel mother!

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